Its all come up now. I wouldn’t be here if I weren’t profoundly frightened. A good jolt sometimes acts well to ease the tension, to take one’s mind off things. A departure. Or some such loss, anything to take one’s mind off certain feelings, that’s what’s required. Anything, a sharp, strong wind to knock some sense into one’s being at last. At times its quiet, its there ever present of course just dormant, this rare period of bliss can make all the dark moments worthwhile. The sheer pressing need to communicate, to open up room for expression. The silence has been enough. I’ve caused enough damage from afar, I’ve lost too many people, friends I was close to for a while. I won’t interfere again—at least not now.
All that’s left is departure. I need to experience space again. To collect my resident knowledge and process it. That will certainly take some time, it will lead me out and away from this sadness, this strange away-time. I’ve been gone for far too long. A new plan will come about, building on the current foundation.
Building Man.
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